Last March, I wrote a post about being fat, and how 2017 was going to be the year of victory in my battle with my weight. I wrote about taking up my cross and following Jesus. I wrote about denying myself. About choosing healthy changes so that I could have a stronger testimony of faith in the God who truly can do anything.
Now, 10 months later, in a new year – nothing has changed. I’m still fat, hanging in there on the scale in the same neighborhood I was in last March. I’ve lost. I’ve gained. I’ve lost. I’ve read. I’ve eaten salads. I’ve gone for walks. I’ve gone to Bible studies. But really, I treaded water – nothing changed.
I said back then that I was going to be delving into the whys and wherefores of my weight issues. I didn’t. I said I was going to focus on Jesus to help me lose weight. I didn’t. And I’m done.
I’ll eat healthy meals most of the time, and allow myself occasional treats because that’s a life of balance. I’ll go for walks and maybe even rejoin a gym because I function better when I’m getting some physical activity – I spend most days at the computer, so need the push of a scheduled time of activity. This too is a life of balance. I’ll read and study the Word, and spend time with the Lord. I’ll try to be healthy. But no more trying to be skinny. No more focusing on losing – it’s time to focus on gaining. Gaining my self-worth in Jesus’ eyes. Gaining my joy in cooking again. Gaining my health. Gaining peace.
What I will commit to:
- More water, less Coke Zero
- More walking, less sitting
- More cooking, less fast food
- More time with Jesus, less time on TV
- More reading for fun, less reading for self-improvement
- More couple time, less self-absorption (because, you know, I can’t really deserve to be loved if I’m fat!)
These are not resolutions or goals. They are life. They are wisdom. They are choices I can live with. And I’ll revisit them here more than once-a-year. I’ll check my progress, and you can hold me accountable. Not for losing, but for gaining.
What will you gain this year?